Category Archives: generational changes

When Letters Were Written…

Posted in family, generational changes, grandkids, Grandparenting, Keepsakes, relationships, Technology, traditions by

Writing letters can be a lot of fun. When we write a letter to a friend or a relative, it’s called a friendly letter.  A friendly letter (or informal letter) is a way of communicating between two people. Who are usually well acquainted.

There are many uses and reason’s for writing a friendly letter and friendly letters will usually consist of a topic on a personal level. Friendly letters can be printed or hand-written. Hand written letters are known for many reasons such as a “The Dear John” letter or a “ The Love Letter.”

I grew up in the fifties and sixties when letters were written. Writing and mailing a letter, post card or a holiday card was the only way I could connect with my long distant friends and family.  Sometimes I would type a letter but most of the time they were hand written. I liked the personal touch. I wasn’t allowed to make  long distance calls unless I could pay for them. So, the price of a stamp it was. Except on special occasions I could pick one person to call for a few minutes.

The first hand written letter that I received was from my grandmother. She lived in Massachusetts and I lived in California. Being a long distant grandmother was definitely a challenge for her but lucky me she was creative a writer and her letters made reading and writing fun for me. I always looked forward to receiving her letters because she had a way of sparking my imagination. Who doesn’t enjoy having their imagination sparked?  It’s because of our letter writing that we managed to maintained a close relationship.

 The letters from my grandmother have become part of my favorite keepsakes. I read them and re-read the letters over and over. It seems like I have read them a million times but that would be an exaggeration.

My grandmother was a busy woman and she still managed to write letters to all fourteen of her grandchildren. She worked as a school teacher for over thirty years. She was known as Nana to fourteen grandchildren. She was happily married for over sixty years and the mother of four children. My grandfather wrote a love letters to her on each of their wedding anniversaries. She out lived him by two years and she kept every letter that he had written to her. How romantic is that? When I think about how wonderful those letters are I wish we still wrote letters today. 

When Life Is Like A Roller Coaster Ride

Posted in Babies, family, generational changes, grandkids by

I often wonder what would happen if our children really knew our stories really knew our lives would they be surprised by our choices? 

 Would they grieve our mistakes? Might our struggles, dreams, our failures and successes, somehow help heal some of the disappointments in their own lives?  Would they or Could they learn from our mistakes?  Some of my friends and family relate to their life stories as portrayed in films such as Parenthood, Terms of Endearment,  In Her Shoes,  The Notebook  or  Message in a Bottle.  As I consider the deep love, commitment, faithfulness, romance, infidelity, life decisions, and healing of relationships that are depicted in these movies, I cry but then when my family and some friends want to laugh at family life we watch a movie called Parenthood and once again the movie takes us back to those, messy, zany, experiences that we had as younger mothers and parenthood doesn’t seem so serious for a while.

Much of the film is based on the family and parenting experiences of the screenwriters and producer Brian Granz, who have 14 children among the four of them. There’s one cinematic scene that is my favorite. It takes place between Steve Martin‘s character  as Gil Buckman and Mary Steenburgen‘s character as Karen Buckman. They are married to each other in the movies and have three children. He’s a neurotic sales executive, trying to balance family life in suburban St. Louis and his career.

When he finds out that his son has emotional problems and the school psychologist tells them that their son needs therapy. Gil begins to blame himself, and deeply questions his abilities as a father. In addition, he’s dealing with his wife telling she is pregnant with their fourth child, he is unsure if he can handle the wonderful news.

 While Gil and Karen are talking about the issues of having a fourth child. Gil’s Grandma comes into the room. She tells them a story about when she was nineteen, and went on a roller coaster ride with Gil’s grandpa. His Grandma describes how much she liked the roller coaster ride.

She tells them, how much fun it was to ride on the roller coaster. It wasn’t boring, like  ridding on the Merry Go Round. The Roller Coaster, went up and down and up and down, and all around. The Merry Go Round just went around. Then Gil’s wife said, Your grandmother’s a smart woman. His replied. If she’s so smart why is she sitting in the neighbors car?

I agree with Gil’s grandmother I preferred the Roller Coaster Ride called parenthood, family and grandparent-hood. How about you do you prefer the Merry Go Round or The Roller Coaster Ride or both?

Those Wonderful Toddler Years…

Posted in family, generational changes, grandkids, relationships, Uncategorized by

My youngest grandson is in his toddler years and I delight in him. His world is an adventure of discovery. He wants to taste, eat, smell and experience everything in his path. He is faster that a speeding bullet more powerful than a locomotive, Route 66 has nothing on him. Jesse is on the move and most of the time he walks to get to where he is going. Sometimes he seems like a toddler hurricane with gusty winds faster than Katrina and Ike combined. He has been known to blow through the house like a mighty wind.

I find that as my grandson’s toddling is tamed by the love and oversight of his parents. I find myself in the mist of a new but yet a familiar adventure. I can’t begin to tell you how often I have had to resist laughing at the most inappropriate times because Jesse is doing something just the way his dad did it at that age.

The truth is when my children went through a few rough patches as toddlers like          when they were teething or learning to walk. There were a few sleepless nights and a few times they had head on crashes with doors and walls. I remember with humor considering getting my son a helmet while he was learning to walk. I wondered if he was going to walk or fly.

As a young mom I didn’t think those,” I just want to pull my hair out kind of days” were fun and as a grandmother I still don’t. But as a seasoned mother I am more relaxed and confident that our little toddler will be just fine as he developes into becoming a big boy and his parents become pros at this parenting stuff. However I do find myself saying; I can’t believe I did that when my children were that age or how in the world did we ever get through their toddler years?

What is best for babies and toddlers has changed throughout the decades but the one thing that remains the same is the little ones are still teething and mothers still have those I just want to pull my hair out kind of days. When I ask myself how did I make it through parenthood?  I stop and remind myself it was all the love and hugs that we shared that got me through parenthood and them through their toddler years. Now they are loving and hugging their children and experiencing “those I just want to pull my hair out kind of days” and doing a terrific job. It’s amazing how much things change and yet how things still stay the same isn’t it?